Kaboom

First thing this morning my sister-in-law sent the family a text message informing us all that she was leaving my little brother and taking their four kids with her. It was actually a kind thing for her to do because he wasn't alone at this really low time for him, but it sent our family spinning into chaos the whole day. We're still trying to piece together the story that brought them to this point, and we'll probably never know. I know my brother and sisters feel the same way: we just want them to be happy--and to protect those children whom we all love and make sure we're still a part of their lives. Seeing marriages fall apart all around me lately, I've been recently pondering what goes into a good marriage. While there are some guidelines, there don't seem to be any hard-and-fast rules. I wonder how some couples go down while some couples seem to pull through what I think of as the inevitable pitfalls, challenges, and tests in any marriage (such as money problems, family pulls, and small children). My heart aches for the ones I see going through the same trials I did, but there's no way to help them. I can say all the usual: stick with it, fight through it, it gets easier, yadda yadda. But do they they hear it? Can they? Is it true? Who knows?

Comments

[Jeanna]

Communicate, communicate, communicate. That's about the best advice I can give for any relationship. The more you talk about your needs and expectations, the less guesswork and potential misunderstandings you'll have to deal with. Then you can better withstand the outside things because your core relationships are intact. Being honest with yourself and others helps a lot, too. Sounds good, but I struggle with it anyway. Most of the time it's more of a goal than a practice.